Porn In The USA

Banks, the auto industry, newspapers, and now porn. It’s a sad, sad, day when the adult entertainment industry needs a bailout. Just the other day, in a conversation with my sweetie pie, I said that the American porn industry as a shining example for the Canadian film industry. Boy was I wrong.

In Canada, a film called Young People Fucking can’t get made without government grants. Think about it: the producers couldn’t find private investors willing to finance this venture. A film about young people, fucking. How could anyone lose money on a production like this?

If it’s anything like this little gem, Lost and Delirious, it’s painfully obvious why Canadian porn (whether it's soft, hard, or slightly turgid) can’t make a buck. Lost and Delirious is a boring film about high school lesbians. Think about it. High school lesbians in a private, all girls, boarding school. Wearing kilts, blazers, white blouses, and knee high socks. And it’s boring.

What kind of retard makes a dull film about high school lesbians? A retard that spent more time filling out requests for government funding than looking for private investors, that’s who. I know where Larry Flynt, circa 1977, would have told the director, writer, and cast of Lost and Delirious or Young People Fucking to stick their ideas about “plot”, “character development”, and “artistic integrity”.

While I don’t condone suicide, it would be nice if more people, especially the rich ones like Larry Flynt and Joe Francis, could you know, learn to suck it up:

The wife of a Long Island broker shot herself in the heart; a utilities executive in Rochester, New York, shut himself in his bathroom and opened a wall jet of illuminating gas; a St. Louis broker swallowed poison; a Philadelphia financier shot himself in his athletic club; a divorcee in Allentown, Pennsylvania, closed the doors and windows of her home and turned on a gas oven. In Milwaukee, one gentleman who took his own life left a note that read, 'My body should go to science, my soul to Andrew W. Mellon, and sympathy to my creditors.'

Department of Dubious Accomplishments: reason scooped me on this story, but it looks like I was one step ahead of Mark Steyn and Megan Mcardle on this one.

Update: Mark Steyn is jumping on the bandwagon, and links to Jules Crittenden in his post.

Update II: This wouldn't be the first adult entertainment bailout.

Update III: More layoffs that affect consenting adults, but one person is doing well despite the economic downturn.

Update IV: The AVN awards show was a much more sombre affair this year.